Captaions Log: Oh Grow Up Already...

So I said this quote the other day via facebook and it went a little something like this "Just because your getting older, doesn't mean your growing up!"

Now before I begin this topic let me start with saying a few things....

1) This book title above just serves as a picture to emphasize the topic at hand but I have not read this book so do not ask me about the book in detail.

2) I am no way, in any shape or form saying that I am the most grown individual in the world

3) I am also not acting as if I have made no mistakes or done any young and childish things in more adult ages because I have! I mean hey, I am not perfect"

But see the first thing I have done that many of men/women will not do is "ADMIT" to such a thing! This quote has been on my mind for sometime because its still baffles me how at my 22 years of age people still act as if they need to be potty trained and given assistance to tie the little bunny loop in the their sneakers. Now, obviously none of these things will be literal but more metaphorical so please do not be asking "who still do not know about the bunny loop" lol!

So yea, like I was saying...Too many people that are adults just do not know how to act!! Why?!?! well, because we are never growing as we "think" we are. We think because we pay a few more bills, start to obtain legal rights to drink, get jobs, take care of ourselves and not depend on our mothers and fathers that we are "grown." Well, yes in some aspects in your life you are very much so an "adult" but do not get it twisted it does not speak for your mentality and the things you do if you get what I am saying. And mind you all of this is more relative to the male and female relationships...cause too many times do BOTH GENDERS act like they are completely illiterate while in relationships...

So whats going on or what am I getting at you say? Well, how many times do you reflect on your life? Not just for a few seconds or minutes...I mean actually sit down and reflect and try to understand why you did the things you did then and how not to do it now. After you get out of a relationship that went terribly wrong do you just brush yourself off and say on to the next one, do you say "ahh well, their lost" or do you sit down and say "man, heres where I went wrong and these are things I wanna improve on before getting into another relationship." Some people would say "Go read the bible, it has all the answers." While I do agree it is not the first thing you will grab (DEPENDING ON WHO YOU ARE) when you are faced in situations like this.

"So wait back track just a sec nemo...I dont get what you are saying about people acting young in a relationship" Well, think about when you get with someone what are you basing your relationships off of "mom, dad, homeboys, cousins, tv, newspaper, the world around you?!?!" these are basically all of the things we use plus our own two cents to help us get through relationships. Do men/women just dont know what the freak common sense is? Do they act childish and not want to listen when you talk with them? Do they want to be able to do their own thing and get to you when they feel like it? Hmmm sounds like a child who wants their cake and wants to be able to eat it to...dont ya think?

So what are you doing to grow as a man or grow as a woman to better yourself in your relationship?

1) Take time to reflect on what you have been through and all the pros and cons on YOUR BEHALF. There is no way that you were ABSOLUTELY PERFECT

2) Ask yourself what you want Physically, Emotionally, Spiritually and all the other words ending with "ally" and yes I stress Physical because you have to be somewhat attracted to the person to even want to find out how great their personality is and all that other stuff

3) Know what you want to do with your life...Goals, Achievements, where you see yourself in a month, a year, etc. Now, you may be saying dang...I really do not know what I want to do...well, that may be a sign of you needing to figure some more things out about you before you acquire a new person in your life and then things have to all of a sudden change because you did not tell them about these things in the beginning

4) Be open to change! Be open to listen! That goes for men and women...Women will complain about how they are never listened to but sometimes are doing to much talking and the men will going around lugging that big chunk of pride around on their backs and feel as if they do not need to talk about nothing....FALSE!

5) and I add a fifth rule because five just seems like a golden number...lol! but, another thought check your maturity level before you get into something. Are you at a point in your life where you can say hey "I want to be with one and only one" or are you at the point where "you just wanna have fun" and honestly and truly "how long do you wanna have fun?" You say its only for college and then you end up graduating and never GROWING and then by the age of 30 or 35 you want to come to your senses.

So nemo, do you do any of the things you practice?

Yea, I do and I have...have I always? Probably not! Have I acted like a git when in relationships...uh yes! Do I get jealous and upset because of my own insecurities and because I know im up to something...uh yes! But, the first part that I am doing that I am welcoming you to do is "admit" (and not necessarily to everyone) your mistakes and now make steps to improve from here out! And does this mean cut someone who is not necessarily on your "GROWN" level...nah, it may mean you may have to assist some what and do your best to work TOGETHER in effort to have a health relationship but You cant "baby" either gender forever and at some point and time you gotta piece out and say "hey, I really did try" and not be so quick to POINT the finger at who was at fault in this relationship....but I think im done...well hold on...another question you are probably asking...

Sooooo nemo must be ready to settle down?

Nope! I am not ready at all...well, I do not wanna say at all I am working on being ready I suppose..But, do I want to work towards that goal...yes, thats not a problem at all. Thats why I am dating getting to know who people are, seeing if they fit me or the things I like, do they make me happy, can I stand them in many other environments other than the "passionate" one that many of us get stuck in and try to go into a relationship from the back door I would call it! Can I see longevity or at least can we work on longevity at least?

Understanding yourself...and even the most complicated things is what you should be doing and thats where you start your growth...WITH YOU! This also allows you to properly receive a good man or woman when they come your way and you do not have to say things like "she's to good for me, or he's way outta my league" all those other little things one says when the person they really doubt is themselves...

But, yea I hope this conveyed the idea I had...If I am wrong and this has some other underlying topic at hand then okay then fit it to that topic then but I think it touched what I needed it to touch. None the less these are things that are on my mind so I had to speak it and if you didnt like it well get your own blogspot and write about something you wanna read about lol! JK! but yea, thanks for the read...holla at ya boi!


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ALSO, IF YOU HAVE NOT READ THE OTHER CAPTAINS LOGS....YOU MIGHT WANNA START